It’s a Backpack, Not a Pillow

I get it, it’s the 12:30am ferry and you look like you had a hard day.  I know, but you know what?  We live in New York City, so WE ALL HAVE!  I want to catch a few zzz’s on the 25 minute trip from Manhattan to Staten Island–and I have.  But what I have not done–and hopefully will NEVER–is try to use someone else’s backpack as a pillow.

Seriously, lean the other way because if you drool on my backpack I might in-a-knee-jerk-reaction accidentally kick you off your seat.

And then I will look like the dickhead.  And I try very hard never to look like a dickhead in public, so just stay in your seat or if you must, lean on the guy sitting on the other side of you.  He looks more understanding [aka is used to looking like a dickhead in public].

That is all…thank you and have a nice day, uh, night…

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Well Played, Dad, Well Played

I’m so used to either really early or really late ferries that I forget how packed (read: annoying) they are during rush hours.  So I’m sitting on a very full ferry and across from me is a dad and daughter who are chatting about this and that while studying/reading and yes, I’m totally eavesdropping–my phone is about to die, what else is a girl to do???

In the background is a screaming Imp.  This is the distinct scream, nay–wail, of being totally pissed off because Imp is obviously not getting what he wanted.  Imp is not in pain, nor hungry, nor has a diaper that needs changing.  He is simply angry. [please note: I’m sure he’s a lovely child, but at that moment, he was being impish–thus, Imp!]

Of course, it’s annoying.  Those on the boat who are parents or very familiar with children, such as myself (because while childless, I have a plethora of nieces and nephews–not to mention 18 “children” at work) recognize this cry for what it is and–like with their own children–are ignoring it.

However, teenage girls who are practicing their big-worth-half-of-my-grade-for-the-year speech cannot tune out screaming Imp.  Finally, in a fit of exasperation, she sighs loudly and throws her hands up in the air.  OH. MY. GOD. will that kid NOT. SHUT. UP???

Dad looks up from ipad in a momentary fog of figuring out what daughter is talking about, registers screaming Imp, smiles, and says “nope, kids are like that and you would do well to remember that before you do anything stupid that would result in having one before you’re ready” and goes back to reading.

LMAO.  Well played, Dad, well played!

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